I almost deleted that last post, but have decided against it. Why apologize for my truth? MY TRUTH is that this weather hurts my feelings. Weighs heavy on my soul. Stifles my creativity. It just isn't good for me. So, as a consolation prize I went shopping yesterday and picked up some new threads. I got three sweaters. One is 100% cashmere by BCBG and appears to be brand new, scooped it up for $9.25. The other two came from J.Crew and Gap, respectively. I also got a few other shirts that I love. I love a good bargain. Crossroads has the best 50% off rack ever. It's basically like shopping at Goodwill but the clothes are consistently better.

Tried to go to a movie tonight. No parking anywhere. Missed the movie. Tried to go to Crossroads. It closed at 8pm. Tried to go to Buffalo. No parking anywhere, had to come home. It's also grey, dark, cold and raining. What a fucking surprise! I HATE THIS CITY SO MUCH TODAY. I don't know how anyone tolerates living in this city, home of the worst fucking weather I've ever seen for 8 months out of the year.

tuesday

Recently, I find myself becoming more and more annoyed with NOISE. The city is so loud and I never get a break from it. Even as I write this, I'm sitting in World Cup and it's so loud I can hear chatter over my headphones, and they're all the way up. So I've decided that I want to move here. This cozy and quaint little mountain cabin. Well, I at least want to own it and spend a month or two at a time here. Yes, I really could stand to be away from people for that long.

lady gaga

She has coffee and cigarettes for breakfast. I've never seen her alone and she always appears to be deep in conversation with a man. I've never seen her smile, but she doesn't look sad either. She's a complex character, that Lady G.

inspire.

Feeling very airy today. Airy in the sense that I feel light. Light in the sense that I am free. Free in the sense that I could travel anywhere I want. I want to dance in a sunny, open field while wearing a flowy dress. I want to hug a tree. Today I visualize myself floating through a field, smiling, dancing, doing yoga, laughing. Carelessly frolicking. Goddess style.

wednesday

Last night I celebrated Julia's birthday with John, Kyla & Kelly at Sapphire Hotel. So yummy and so fun! I liked that it was an intimate group and we all got to catch up. However, it made me realize that I really don't want to go out to eat anymore. Here's what it's like for me (or for the server is more like it):

• Is this gluten free?
• Does this have cheese? 
• What kind of cheese? It is really gooey or is there just a little bit of dairy in the sauce?
• Can I have a mug of hot water with lemon?
• And a regular water with no ice, please.
• Is your house white dry? No? Okay I'll need another minute.

All of those questions/requests really happened. She was nice about it and I tried not to be annoying but I'm sure I was. I also think saying, "I'm sorry, I know that's annoying" or "I'm being really annoying" is the MOST annoying thing of all, so instead of saying that I just smiled and thanked her. It's such a pain to go out if you have dietary restrictions, especially if you are still getting used to them yourself.

Speaking of the dietary issues, I feel like the gluten free/dairy free thing is working out. I still think I have some issues that need to be sorted out, but maybe it's getting a little better? I definitely feel more in control of things. I also started doing warm water with lemon and cayenne, which sounds gross but actually feels pretty good. I feel like my body is in major repair mode. I don't have much energy, and I don't know if that means I'm just lazy or my body is actually repairing itself, but I've been sleeping a lot. Like 10-12 hours a night for the past four nights a lot. Last Friday after Mysore I came home and fell asleep for a few hours without even showering first. I just immediately crashed. I wondered if pushing my body to wake up at 5:30 and practice for 90 or so minutes was too much for my body right now, so I decided to let myself wake up naturally this week and it's been between 8:30 and 10am. Obviously too late to go to Mysore. I've been taking walks, but I feel so low energy that walking with any sort of speed is not really happening. The good news is that I have lost 5 pounds since I wrote about gaining 20, I found that out yesterday. I think it mostly has to do with cutting gluten and dairy and also making sure I don't eat too late at night. I always had a bad habit of eating after my evening classes, which would sometimes be as late as 9 or 9:30 (yes, that is late when you're asleep by 11 at the latest). Things are feeling like they're getting back on track (at least for now), slowly but surely. Now all I have to do is go see the naturopath and really get things right.

vacation

I need a vacation. A real one, not a trip back to Virginia. I'm not picky about where I go. In fact, I would be happy with either of the following:

• Somewhere warm, sunny and tropical. This place should have white sandy beaches and clear water. Wherever I stay should have an infinity pool. All of my meals will be eaten outdoors with stunning ocean views. There will be jet skiing involved, and lazy days lounging on a boat. I will have a tan and wear a white bikini and look like a goddess.
• Somewhere cold, snowy and majestic. Wherever I stay will be nestled in the middle of a ski town. I will wear cozy boots, sweaters, scarves and hats and drink lattes every morning by a fireplace. During the day I will snowboard my ass off. At night I will return to the fireplace in my pajamas and drink wine. I'll be too tired to snowboard every day, so there will be a spa day in there complete with a massage, facial and probably some other treatments I'm not even familiar with.

After writing this, I have decided that I much prefer the latter. I'm thinking Aspen or Park City. I should also mention that for this vacation, I will have plenty of money to spend on activities, spa treatments, shopping and lavish dinners.

wednesday

I’ve done Mysore twice more since I last wrote. I made the mistake of going two days in a row, one of the mornings I taught a 90 minute heated power vinyasa class right after. Perhaps the mistake was not going two days in a row, but rather going on a morning I had to teach. I felt so weak and wiped out because I didn’t have time to eat anything or rest. I am a fan of slow mornings and yesterday was anything but. I decided to take today off, and probably tomorrow too. I’ll return on Friday.

In other news, I’m on day 10 of gluten free, and mostly dairy free too. Most days I don’t have dairy, but there’s a salad dressing I like that has milk in it so I continue to eat it. I think I’m feeling better? It’s hard to say, the naturopath at Yoga Pearl says I should give it a minimum of 5 weeks. I like being mindful of what I eat. I am a total label reader. Not sure where I picked up that habit, but I think it pays to know what’s in your food.

Today is Tiffany’s birthday and she’s spending it alone in Greece. Not the worst place to be if you have to spend your birthday alone, but I’m sure it’s still lonely. I’m wearing a pair of the Nikes she gave me right now. It’s a pretty safe assumption that I’m always wearing at least one thing she gave me since she gave me so much clothing, shoes and jewelry. I love it! 

best dressed

And now for something completely different...

I just came across People Magazines list of the Best Dressed Celebs of 2012. First of all, fashion is completely subjective. They have listed Gwyneth Paltrow as The WORLD'S Best Dressed Woman. No. Just no. And secondly, these people all have stylists who put their outfits together for them, and a completely disposable income. These people have an extreme advantage. Aside from Gwyneth, here's what I think about their other 9 picks:

Kate Middleton: The classic beauty. Does she look nice? Yes. Does she dress like she's 30? Not in my opinion. Most of her outfits look matronly. But, I get that she's the future Queen of England and has to keep it classy, so she gets a pass.

Emma Stone: The red carpet ruler.  Nothing about her stands out to me. Red carpet ruler seems like a huge overstatement.

The Kardashians: Brunette bombshells. I love the Kardashian sisters. Kourtney's style is my favorite. Very boho chic. I like it. Kim is a little over the top for my taste, but I generally like the way she dresses. Khloe too.

Miranda Kerr: The street style pro. She's wearing pants with a floral print in the photo they chose and that is a huge no-no in my book. I hate floral prints.

Reese Witherspoon: The hot mama. I do love Reese and her down to earth style. I wouldn't mind having her wardrobe. Jennifer Garner too.

Rihanna: The risky renegade.  I'm not sure what statement she is trying to make, but I very much dislike her style. Looks pretty tasteless and most of the time slutty to me. She has the type of body that she can wear anything and look good, but that doesn't necessarily mean she should.

Jessica Alba: The jean queen. Possibly my favorite on this list. I love how she is always pairing jeans with a blazer and scarf. I love that look and when I wear clothing that isn't made of Luon, I love jeans and a blazer. So clean!

Diane Kruger: The high fashion pro. I know nothing about high fashion and therefore know nothing about her or her style. If it's high fashion I probably don't like it ;)

Jennifer Lawrence: Best rising star. Don't know anything about her either. I suck at fashion blogging. Think I'll stick to yoga...

saturday

I'm happy to report that I'm feeling better today. Better for this moment. I have lots of ups and downs. From an Ayurvedic perspective, this would be considered a vatta imbalance. From a western perspective, this would be considered bipolar, or just plan crazy. I may be a little crazy, but probably not any more than the next person. I'm taking a workshop next weekend at Yoga Pearl called "What's Yer Dosha" with Britt Bensen Steele. It's an Ayurveda workshop and I'm really excited to have the opportunity to learn from her. I've been taking her classes and I always love what she has to say.

This morning Keith and I went to breakfast at Besaw's. It was a late breakfast, we got there around 11:15. Who goes to breakfast at 11:15 on a Saturday morning? Everyone. We waited for about 30 minutes, but then scored a really great table so it all worked out. I've been gluten free for a week now and was thrilled to see that they offered gluten free pancakes and french toast, as well as gluten free bread. The bread was delicious, not like cardboard at all. It tasted and looked a little like cornbread. Maybe it was? I stayed away from the pancakes and french toast because I'm not clueless enough to think that gluten free is synonymous with healthy. I wouldn't order regular pancakes, and I wouldn't order them gluten free either.

Last night after taking Britt's class, I was talking with her about my digestive issues and she told me she doesn't think I should be doing raw food as it can be very difficult to digest. What a bummer. I do tons of raw food and I happen to love it. But the truth is, I don't always feel great after I drink a smoothie or eat a raw spinach and veggie salad. She suspects I'm having issues with malabsorption. Sometimes my body feels like my worst enemy and I want to scream at it, "WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON, ANYWAY?!"

ashtanga day three, plus twenty pounds

I went to Mysore this morning. I had a much better practice than Wednesday. I felt stronger and more confident. But as I write this I am feeling very sad. I had a great morning. After yoga I came home and showered, Keith woke up early and we went out for coffee at Dragonfly. After that, he came home and I ran some errands. I ended up at Walgreens to buy some sort of natural & organic body wash, and they were doing free health screenings so I decided to get one. My blood pressure was low, not to my surprise, but my weight was fucking high. I have gained twenty pounds since I got married two years ago. Twenty! I understand that this happens to some women after marriage. They get comfortable, start cooking for their husbands and consequently start eating like them as well, and spend more time on lounging on the couch in sweatpants watching TV than they do exercising. But I didn't do any of that. Keith eats grilled cheese sandwiches, pizza, spaghetti and cheese quesadillas that he cooks for himself. I eat kale, spinach, quinoa, fresh fruits and vegetables. I barely eat any sweets, don't drink soda, very little alcohol, and eat very little processed or packaged food. So what gives?! I don't go to the gym but I walk everywhere I go, and I teach and practice yoga almost daily. I don't eat fast food, I don't lay on the couch all day making excuses, and I've been eating cleaner and simpler in the past two years than I ever have before. I know to most people this is a silly thing for me to be upset over, but I put a lot of emphasis on my personal wellness only to have packed on twenty mother fucking pounds in two years. Yes, I feel sad. It's not like I can say, "oh, I've gained weight! I'd better stop eating cookies and drinking soda and get my ass to yoga!" Initially I felt okay about the weight gain because my BMI came up in the middle range of normal, body fat was low, skeletal muscle was high and visceral fat was way low, but I made a huge mistake after that. I tried on my wedding dress to make sure it still fits. It does still fit, but I look like a sausage in it. Okay, maybe not a sausage, but in my opinion it looks pretty terrible. How depressing. And yes, I know, I am grateful for my overall health. I am grateful that even though I weigh more than I'd like, I am very healthy on paper. I know that people have "real" problems, much bigger than this. But still, it just sucks. I've always struggled with body image-related issues, so this is a hard thing for me to deal with. It's a demon I've been battling almost constantly for more than 10 years. I don't feel like talking about it anymore.

ashtanga day two

I went to Mysore again this morning. I set my alarm for 5:40am, and was please to wake naturally at 5:30. I love when this happens. I seem to have this internal alarm clock that allows me to wake up a few minutes before my alarm goes off. My day is always better when I can wake up naturally, even if it's early, as opposed to the abrasive sound of an alarm. Even though my alarm sounds like birds, I still find it a harsh way to start the day.

I picked my clothes out and laid them by the door last night so all I had to do this morning was wash my face, brush my teeth and get dressed. I was at Yoga Pearl by 5:50 and had already started my practice by 6. Today was harder than Monday and I was mentally taking a beating. I had a hard time getting through my sun salutations because of my weak and popping shoulders, and for some reason I was refusing to relax my neck in down dog, something I regularly correct in my classes. It seems that nothing goes unnoticed by Jason (the teacher), because I heard "Tami, relax your neck" at least three times from various places in the room. Jason is a fantastic teacher and pays close attention to detail. However, on a day where I was already feeling a little mentally week, I was wishing some things could slip under the radar. I asked him about the popping in my shoulders. He looked at me in chaturanga and suggested that I not lower down as much, and when that didn't feel better he said I could skip it. I hate not being able to do things. Part of the problem today was that I pushed myself so much on Monday that I was really sore today, so the weakness in my shoulders was amplified. I think it took me about 30 minutes to make it through 10 sun salutations (5 A, 5 B). I already felt defeated and I hadn't even really started. I got so lightheaded that I had to drop to my mat not once but several times throughout my practice, and I was feeling impatient for not having memorized the sequence. I had a lot going on in my head this morning. After a little over an hour of practice, Jason told me I was done and I could move to the wall. I was so relieved.

This practice is hard. I'm finding that it's stirring things up for me and it, at least for now, is requiring more mental strength than physical. Don't get me wrong, it requires physical strength too, but the mental strength you have to have in order to endure the physical is great. Part of me wanted to cry this morning and another part of me wanted to leave. I didn't do either, but I found myself asking "Why am I here?". Like Monday, I wondered if I will ever be strong enough to endure this practice? Will I ever complete the Primary Series? And more questions of that nature...

I didn't feel as energized this morning after class as I did on Monday. I'm not sure if it was because I was tired, the sky was grey, or what. But I do know that I plan to continue. We'll see what Friday brings...

diary of a brand new mysore ashtangi

I made it through my first morning of Mysore. It was challenging and humbling, but it also felt very meditative. I was the only new person in class, so that felt pretty strange. It's weird to be the new person in a room where you teach. Here are some thoughts that went through my head during my practice:

• Why doesn't anyone else have water next to their mat? Is it not allowed? I guess I won't drink any...
• Why are my shoulders popping like that with every chaturanga? If I skip a few, will anyone notice? If Jason notices will I get in trouble?
• How is it possible that I am the least advanced person in the room? I know nothing about yoga. I shouldn't be here.
• How many postures are there? How many will he give me? Am I going to be here for the whole three hours?
• My arms are too short to get my butt off the floor in baddha padmasana. Or I'm not strong enough? WHY are my shoulders so hyper mobile?! Will they ever get stronger?
• I wonder how long some of these people have been practicing? They have everything memorized and seem to float through everything effortlessly.
• Whoa, that girl has both legs behind her head and she's balancing on her hands. 

More tomorrow... 

super sunday

Today was a really great late summer day. Here's what I did:

• slept in with Keith
• made breakfast (scrambled eggs with avocado and green chili sauce)
• went to Dragonfly Coffee House for lattes
• met Kyle and his mom at Jam for late brunch
• wandered around Hawthorne with Kyle & Keith. They drank beer, I created an amazing blend of essential oils (dark amber, french vanilla & woodlands).
• came home with Keith and Kyle and cooked a superb dinner (wild alaskan salmon, brown rice, red quinoa, garlic, red & orange peppers, squash & kale)
• wrote this blog

Going to bed really early tonight... I'm giving Mysore a shot this week to see if I can find my groove there. I'm meeting Nikki at Yoga Pearl at 5:45am. Yikes. I guess I'll write more about that tomorrow...

wednesday

Let me start by saying this: I suck at quitting coffee. I have tried several times without success, and I always go back to it for two reasons. One, I miss the ritual. Two, I crave it. But that's not why I write this blog.

Do you ever have one of those experiences where you wonder, is this real? Like, is this really happening? This morning I was grabbing my latte at World Cup and I wanted to put some honey in it before I sat down (thank you, Hema, for that habit). The little bar with all the fixings really only has room for two people, and there were two people already standing there. They each had what appeared to be drip coffee, and they each appeared to put a little bit of everything in it. Sugar, cream, cinnamon, nutmeg, I mean a little bit of everything. I must have waited there (patiently, I might add) for two minutes. It got to the point where I wanted to walk between them and say, "Excuse me, but do either of you even like coffee? Why are you ruining it with all that stuff?!" I felt like I was in a movie or something. Like, they couldn't possibly be still standing there fixing up their coffee, right? Finally, the girl walked away and I added my squirt of honey. Now I sit, enjoying the latte and writing this blog.

Some people call alcohol liquid sunshine. Coffee is mine :)

Joy List

• Any song by Florence + The Machine. Particularly Breath of Life, Drumming Song, Cosmic Love, Only If For A Night, Seven Devils & No Light. I think Florence Welch might be my most favorite musician ever.
• My nieces & nephews. I could spend hours (and sometimes do) talking about how cute, funny and sweet they are.
• Mt Hood. Hiking on it, snowboarding on it, catching glimpses of it from Portland. Everything about it, I love.
• Maxi dresses.
• Avocados.
• Friends, old and new. 
• Bright blue sunny skies.
• Scarves. Especially into circle scarves right now.
• Traveling.
• Freshly painted fingernails.
• Coffee. Particularly a nice foamy latte or cappuccino, but drip coffee excites me too.
• Yoga. Obviously...
• My tutu.
• Chunky arm & leg warmers.
• Candles.
• Big, tall, old trees.
• Boots. 
• Sea salt & ketchup.
• Southern California. Especially San Diego, and to be even more specific- La Jolla. Los Angeles too, and my friends there. 
• Cleanliness. I like it neat and tidy. 
• Marcel the Shell With Shoes On. 
• Anthropologie. 
• Vinho Verde. Especially when it's shared with a friend.
• Hiking. Running through the forest. 
• My memory of riding the chair lift at Ski Bowl with Sarah C. at night and screaming WOOOOO! because we though nobody was around, when actually a skier was two chairs ahead of us the whole time.
• Also, my memory of getting stuck on that same chair lift with Sarah and the awkward conversation we had with the skier behind us who told us all about how she went on four dates with the lift operator. 
• Sex & The City. Still.
• All of the "power" women I have connected with and been inspired so deeply by in my life. Too many to name. Tiffany, Hemalayaa, Melissa... and the list goes on.
• Mimosas & peach bellinis.
• Tiny things.
• Loud music. Thanks Chet.
• Dancing around my apartment and going, wooo! Thanks Mom. 
• Any memory I have of Cindy, the only person I love like I love my actual mother.
• Most of my Bottoms Up memories. Probably not appropriate to list on here.
• My own ability to stand up for myself speak my truth.
• Green smoothies. Oh, do I love a green smoothie.
•  Making lists.

dreaming of sd

Today I am dreaming of San Diego. I was watching an episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians this morning where they went to La Jolla to visit Kris' mom. I gasped when I saw images of La Jolla, and I've seen it a bunch. It feels like home to me. Every time I leave there, I cry. Last time I was there, I seriously considered not getting on the plane to return to Portland. I also considered moving there without my husband, that's how badly I want to be there. It's hard not to think about it right now because I was offered a full scholarship for a teacher training program at La Jolla Yoga Center that started in January and would be ending this month.

Today I feel a little bit sad and a little bit stuck. This is the one thing I've consistently wanted for nearly a decade, but fear holds me back. I was recently asked by Tiffany Cruikshank, what one thing would you do if you knew you could not fail? The answer was obvious.

super sunday

Yesterday was so dreamy. I had a wonderful 10 1/2 hours of sleep, woke up and walked to Coffeehouse Northwest for a tasty cappuccino, took a deliciously spicy yoga class from Kathryn Budig at Yoga Pearl, got some lovely new pieces of clothing from Anthropologie, ate a huge salad from Whole Foods, then went to see my beloved Florence Welch play at Edgefield. Everything I did yesterday fed my soul.

hood river

I'm here in Hood River at my favorite coffee shop, Doppio Coffee+Lounge. I'm on my way to eastern Oregon for the Yoga Roundup and could not resist stopping at this gorgeous place along the way to get some work done. I love it here, it's the perfect escape from Portland and only and hour and fifteen minutes away. Feels very familiar since I come here fairly often. I fantasize about living here and working at this sweet little coffee shop and teaching yoga around the corner at Flow Yoga. It just seems like the most quaint little town filled with friendly, outdoorsy people.

Keith and I came here for our second anniversary recently. We had coffee and bagels, then went up the mountain and visited a couple wineries. It was the perfect day.

tiny home

I WANT THIS.

I dream of living like this in a simplistic, minimalistic place in nature. Some days I want to sell all my stuff, buy one of these things and take it out on the open road. Doesn't it look so cozy in there? I want to be there right now.

I love.

I love coffee. Coffee and green smoothies. With coconut oil, copious amounts of kale & spinach, loads of fresh (not frozen) fruit and almond milk.

I love trees and nature. Sunshine on a crisp, cool day and sunshine on a warm day too.

I love yoga.

I love gold bangles. Dangling earrings & bright lipstick. Maxi dresses and scarves.

I love traveling. Oh, I love traveling.

I suck at blogging.

I also suck at keeping my opinion to myself sometimes.

I made the decision a while ago to stop posting about or commenting on anything political on Facebook. It was a good decision, and I may need to apply that philosophy to anything at all that could be considered controversial.

Recently on Facebook, I implied that Dave Matthews Band was... not good. It prompted something of a Facebook war, and I decided not to make another comment about it. I just stopped looking and went to bed. I do think Dave Matthews is lame, right along with Creed and Nickelback. But that doesn't mean other people don't think they're amazing. Who knew? ;)

Last night, I saw some posts about how 50 Shades Of Grey was a great book. Really? A great book? Was Twilight a great book? There's your answer. I refrained from commenting.

friday

I can't wait to get back to Virginia for a nice long visit. By the time I land at RIC, it will have been a year (almost to the exact day) since I've had my feet on Virginia soil. I'm so excited for summer weddings and birthday parties, and lots of time with family and old friends. I have great friends here (Julia... I'm talking to you!), but sometimes I do miss the familiarity of my old life. I call it my old life because everything is different about my life since I've moved to Oregon. I think I'm still the same person at my core, but I'm also quite different. Not sure if that's because I moved away from everyone and everything I knew, because I've gotten older, or maybe a combination of both? I'll go with the latter.

When I am in Virginia, it feels like I never left, and like it's been lifetimes since I left- all at the same time. It's pretty weird. The first time I visited after I moved, I remember feeling very confused. I felt homeless. Now that I've been here for more then three years, I feel much more settled and this is definitely my home. At least that's one thing I'm certain about.

The photo was taken at Timberline Lodge a month ago, just a few days before my surgery. I love nature so much, and Timberline is one of my favorite places. I can think of different things I love at each of Mt. Hood's three resorts, but my favorite thing about Timberline is that on a clear day, you can see forever. You can see Mt. Jefferson, Dollar Lake & Ski Bowl. The view is just infinite. It's so quiet up there. My favorite thing about Meadows is just how huge it is. It can take you quite a while to get from top to bottom if you want it to. There are a million places to explore. My favorite thing about Ski Bowl is this run on the Upper Bowl that takes you on a long trip around the edge of the mountain. It's easy, very few sharp turns and only one spot I detest (it's on a curve and uphill so yo have to be going really fast to get past it, no thanks). The views are stunning. Sometimes I really think the main reason I love snowboarding is because you get to take in views that you otherwise wouldn't see.

Soon I will be healed and I will be able to get back to doing all the things I love. Soon!

wednesday

I've been terrible about keeping up with this blog. I finally had knee surgery to remove part of my meniscus last week and the recovery has been more difficult than I'd anticipated. My doctor had me believing I would be feeling better just hours after the surgery, and walking within 24-48 hours. Not the case. My knee still does not feel better and I just started walking without crutches last night, and not very well either. I am very slow and each step is taken with extreme caution. It's only been six days, so I'm not complaining, I only wish I'd been more prepared.

Here are some things I can't wait to do as soon as I'm all better:

• run
• take a spin class
• get on the stairmaster
• hike
• snowboard
• practice yoga without pain

I went outside for the first time in 5 days yesterday. I was so happy about it, I wish I had a picture. It reminds me of a story my mom told me about when I was 13 months old in the hospital with meningitis. I was in there for a long time, and when it was time for me to go home and I saw my coat my face lit up like a Christmas tree. My soul has always needed to be free, even when it was just a tiny soul. I can't be confined to a bed indoors!

ugh

I need a vacation right now or I will completely stop functioning. I need to get out from under this cold, wet grey cloud and go somewhere sunny and warm where I can frolic on the beach. Meltdown, happening.

sunday

Yay! Happy day! It was so sunny and nice today, so I decided to walk to Goodwill to see if I could find a teapot for cheap. Not only did I find a cheap teapot, but I found this super pretty porcelain one from Pier 1 and it was only $5.50. Obviously, I scooped it up. I also got lucky and scored some food canisters for $1.50 each, and a cute little basket for my tea for 50 cents. How exciting! I love a good bargain.

saturday

I am feeling quite inspired this morning. The problem is, I have all these ideas in my mind, but I feel either too lazy or too overwhelmed to do something about it, I can't tell which.

One thing I need is my own desk at home. A desk without any of Keith's stuff on it, and no clutter. Energetically, his desk does not work for me.

I also want some new stuff in my kitchen. I am in the process of ditching everything plastic. I got rid of my plastic food storage containers in favor of glass. Now I want to get some glass jars to keep my rice and quinoa in. For now, I keep them in the plastic bags I bring them home in. How much nicer would it be to have these cute little glass jars with my bulk stuff in on my counter? I'd also like to get rid of my plastic measuring spoons and cups in favor of stainless steel, and replace our plastic spatula with a stainless steel one. And a cute wicker basket for my tea. Right now I have it in one of my Pyrex mixing bowls. Not very aesthetically pleasing, and I'd like that mixing bowl back. I also want to put the coffee pot up in a cabinet because we've switched over from coffee to tea. A teapot would be nice, too. I'd love to get rid of the microwave, but Keith still uses it. That would really open up lots of counter space, and give me an extra plug too.

I don't have the energy for all that right now. In fact, I think I'm going to go take a nap. I didn't sleep well last night!

i love kale

Last night I cooked dinner for four of my girlfriends. It was so much fun! I made a mixture of quinoa and brown rice with kale, tomatoes and avocado, topped with green chile sauce. I love healthy cooking! That sauce is so delicious. For breakfast this morning, I had 2 scrambled eggs, half an avocado and green chile sauce on top. So good! And now I'm having a smoothie with kale, almond milk, ground chia seeds, brown rice protein powder, apple and banana. Also so good!

saturday

sunday morning

It's another warm and sunny day here in LA. I woke up at 9:15 this morning, which is late for me. I slept well last night, but I took two Tylenol PM's so I feel like I cheated. I really needed sleep though. Hema and I are working all day today and I was in desperate need of some fuel.

I guess I don't really have much to write about this morning. The only other thing I can think to write is that I am drinking some tea and that is not interesting.

saturday

Los Angeles is so dreamy. Today has been super sunny and warm, hot even. 80 degrees. I didn't sleep well last night, so I've been really tired all day. I had green tea with Hema this morning and then practiced on my own in the garden. Totally basking in the warmth of the sun.

I met Diane at Bungalow again, had an iced decaf almond milk latte and some oatmeal. I am trying to take better care of myself. Too much caffeine makes me feel sick, and my digestion has been so out of whack. Even my lunch at Cafe Gratitude yesterday didn't sit well with me. Not sure what is going on there? Thinking I may try to cut out gluten and dairy for a week to see how I feel. I am tired of feeling crappy and lethargic all the time.

Hema's neighborhood is so peaceful. Right now I can hear a dog barking in the distance, and two little boys playing basketball. Even though LA is notorious for poor air quality, it smells so clean and fresh today. I had almost forgotten that there are places in the world and aren't cold, damp and dark. I'm sitting on the front porch with a short sleeved top, leggings and no shoes or socks. It feels great and free. I'm also drinking a smoothie with beet and pear, among other things. I feel so at home.

Tonight we are going to a birthday party in Playa Vista. It's supposed to be a small gathering. I'm looking forward to it.

I think I'l go do some more yoga before I hop in the shower and get ready for our evening.

friday

My first day in Los Angeles.

I made it to the airport this morning just in time to get through security, grab a cup of coffee and get on the plane. I love it when I time things so perfectly. I met a woman who was from Bend. She was meeting her sister in LA and they are flying to Africa tomorrow. We chatted the whole flight.

The weather was amazing today. Bright, sunny and warm. I had lunch at Cafe Gratitude with Hema and Diane. We saw a celebrity (or two) coming out as we were going in. It was so bizarre. The paparazzi were frantic to snap their photos. I'm not sure who they were because I didn't want to act like I cared, but I really wish I knew.

I had a great meeting with Diane at The Bungalow, from there I came back to Hema's and she cooked dinner for her friend Rekha and me. Then H and I took a walk around the neighborhood. The weather was still nice. It was cool, but not cold. The sky was clear and we could see all the stars. The moon was beautiful, it made me think of my mom.

I had a shower and then came to the main house (where I'm staying with Rekha) to go to sleep. Ended up having a nice chat with R and learned that we have some things in common. She gave me some herbs to help me sleep, and now I am going to test their effectiveness.